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História Memento Mori - Capítulo 34


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Capítulo 34 - Confession Song


Fanfic / Fanfiction Memento Mori - Capítulo 34 - Confession Song

“Stop it! I don’t want it. You don’t love me!” Youngjae protested, as JB climbed on top of him on the couch and held him by the wrist. He stared hard into his ex’s terrified eyes.

 

“Were you lying to me too?” His tone was softer, but he still held Youngjae firmly by the wrists. “Come on, say you love me, Samchon.” The younger swallowed, when the older brushed his lips against his.

 

“I didn’t do anything to separate Mark and Jinyoung. I’m not like that! I never agreed to help you with anything. If they broke up, I have nothing to do with it. Now get off me, Lim Jaebeom.” Youngjae demanded, but there was nothing he could do to free himself from JB’s strong arms.

 

“Mark and Jinyoung can go to hell for all I care! They’re both assholes, but you’re better than them. You’re that sweet, innocent boy who I met years ago, who always made the sun shine brighter in my sky. I know you kept secrets to protect me in the past, I know you left me because you thought it would hurt me more if you told me the truth about what was going on with my mom. But you were wrong. Knowing that I had lost you, tore me apart! I’d have dealt better with my mother’s sickness than I did with your departure. Listen to me, Jae! Back at the hospital, you told me that you knew how it felt to love someone and not be able to act on that love. Do it now, act on the love you feel for me.” A desperate Jaebeom pleaded.

 

“I wasn’t talking about you. Don’t flatter yourself. Get the fuck off me, now!” Youngjae’s eyes brimmed with tears.

 

“Who’s the one you love then, huh? Is it, Nam? He wasn’t even in the picture at the time. I can tell you’re lying! Who’s he, Youngjae?!” Jaebeom asked, refusing to let go of the younger.

 

“I do not know who you are anymore! You’re hurting me! I told you to get off me!” Youngjae shouted this time and JB immediately let go of his wrists and got up. The younger sobbed uncontrollably as he sat up and massaged his pulse. Jaebeom looked terrified when he realized what he had done. He crouched in front of the boy trying his best not to scare him. He put both his hands on his head when he saw the red bruise around the boy’s wrists.

 

“Jae, Jae, honey. I’m sorry, baby. Please, forgive me, I didn’t mean to use so much strength. Oh, God! What did I do? I’m a jerk, please look at me. Believe me when I say that I love you, my darling. I love you so fucking much. I should’ve taken the shot of vodka, but I was too prideful to do it! I wanted to punish you all this time for all the wrong reasons. Please don’t hate me. I can’t live without you, Samchon! I’ve been miserable because I don’t have you by my side. I knew that all along. Mark and I was a thrilling accident, you and I are a miracle. My destiny is yours. My heart belongs to you and always will. I love you.” A panicked Jaebeom desperately said at once.

 

“Are you saying all that just to get into my pants? Because you fear that Eric might have what only you were able to put your hands on?” Youngjae stopped crying and stared back at his ex. He didn’t look convinced.

 

“Yes!” he said quickly and the other furrowed his brows. JB was unable to explain himself. “I mean, yes and no. I-I just want you back, okay? I beg you to give me one more chance. I know I don’t deserve it, but I hope you can at least think about it, okay? Look, you were right all along, you know me more than anyone else! I am not my brother. I’m not happy to see him unhappy. I don’t like seeing him all crazy again. I can only be happy if I have you.” Jaebeom confessed as he reached for his hands and gently kissed both the boy’s wrists. Youngjae didn’t push him away this time.

 

“No more revenge plan?” the younger raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“No.”

 

“Are you gonna lead Got7 as you’re supposed to, and stop thinking that your own friends are laughing at you!?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“I don’t know what you’ve been up to while I was away. But I still only do serious relationships. There’s no sex without love and no commitment without trust.” Youngjae stated seriously.

 

“You haven’t changed a bit. I like the sound of that.” Jaebeom smiled proudly, ruffling the younger’s hair.

 

“I haven’t been with anyone else, I mean, in bed. Have you?” Youngjae asked a bit embarrassed.

 

“You know Mark and I never went all the way. There was no one else.” JB assured him, as he caressed his thighs.

 

“It’s been more than a year, JB. Are you sure? I don’t wanna get any STDs, you know?” Youngjae said, as he looked away.

 

“Wait, that means you wanna have sex with me?” JB winked at him playfully.

 

“It means I love you too, stupid.” Youngjae’s honest eyes met his this time. Jaebeom smiled fondly at him. He felt a lump in his throat when he held both sides of his face and brought it closer to him. He kissed Youngjae’s forehead, than both his cheeks and finally his lips.

 

In another part of the house, the Markjin couple argued. Their voices echoed inside a huge closet. Seven minutes had already passed, but their desire to shout at each other kept them there longer than necessary to complete the dare. Youngjae certainly predicted that.

 

“Are you fucking Taehyung or not?!” Mark was already tired of asking the same thing.

 

“I refuse to answer this stupid question! You have four fucking guys after your ass and that’s all you wanna talk about?” Jinyoung shot back.

 

“Four!? I thought you were good at math Jinyoung! I only have you and Jackson as boyfriends!”

 

“Oh, really? What about Nam and my brother?” Jinyoung eyed him suspiciously.

 

“JB and I decided to be friends! Eric is not after my ass whatsoever! We broke up, remember?”

 

“Mark, I can’t take this any longer! I want them to know you chose me, I want the whole fucking world to know that you are mine.” The young Lim was unrelenting.

 

“I will talk to Jack tomorrow, okay?! We both will, I promise. It might take a bit longer to tell our parents. You need to be patient.”

 

“Why?!” The young Lim asked stubbornly.

 

“I need to be eighteen by then, have a job, I don’t know. If Dorine tries to kick me out or send me away, at least I’ll be able to fend for myself. There’s also my father’s inheritance. I can have access to it as a minor. We gotta wait.” The American explained, hoping that he didn’t have to have that conversation again with Jinyoung. He was already tired of trying to convince his boyfriend of the obvious risks of such a revelation.

 

“We can always rob a bank and run away together. That’s what you told your mom, right?” Jinyoung smirked at his boyfriend.

 

“I never said anything about robbing a bank.” Mark swallowed,  hoping the other would take the subject more seriously.

 

“I didn’t know you had defended our relationship so bravely. I mean, I am the stepbrother you said you’d run away with, right?”

 

“Of course, but she thinks I was talking about JB.” Mark clarified and took a deep breath. “By the way, are you finally gonna tell me what is going on between you and your brother? Last time you said he tried to blackmail you but you didn’t tell me the details. Now you two seem okay. Have you guys made up?”

 

“Everything will be all right after tonight. I’ll certainly have my brother back, don’t worry. I didn’t lure all the Got7 members to this party without a plan.” Jinyoung said simply.

 

“What the hell is your plan exactly? What do you intend to achieve this time?” Mark dreaded to know what the Korean was plotting.

 

“I told JB that you and I broke up. I asked for his forgiveness and told him that he and I should stay away from Mark Tuan from now on. I told him no one would come between us twins, and also sputtered a few other cringey lines that only an actor like me would be able to deliver flawlessly. You see, I needed to get his trust back, in order to manipulate him. Deep down, he’s probably still mad at me, but he listened to me when I told him about what was going on at school. I believe that a rival might force him to realize that Youngjae is the one for him. So I made up a strong adversary for Jaebeom. Let’s see how things will turn out. Once he’s not so bitter, all the resentment will go away. My prediction is that 2Jae will be reunited in no time. Mark my words.” Jinyoung’s overconfident expression bothered the older.

 

“Did you say a rival? I don’t get it. How exactly did you manipulate JB?”

 

“I made him think that Jae and Eric Nam may become a thing. I exaggerated a bit as I gave him my account of the latest events. I changed little facts and spiced things up for the sake of a possible goal. The truth is, jealousy tends to make people reveal what is really in their hearts, you know? As soon as you, him, your ex, and Jae were in the same room together, I would be able to tell if JB was jealous of you or Jae. Well, did you see my brother’s face when Nam addressed Jae with a simple ‘Jae-ah’?” Jinyoung felt smug.

 

“That’s stupid, Jinyoung! You’re using Eric to-”

 

“It’s brilliant, babe! Don’t you see? How mad were you when I arrived at this party with Taehyung by my side?” Jinyoung gave him a cocky smile.

 

“Did you just make me think that you were with Taehyung so I’d be forced to dump Jackson faster?”

 

“Tomorrow, exactly. That’s what you just promised me. We’re telling him tomorrow.” Jinyoung reminded him.

 

“Jesus Christ, you’re such a bastard.” The American shook his head in disbelief.

 

“Right. But this bastard loves you, and you love this bastard.” Jinyoung claimed with a cheeky grin playing on his lips. Without much notice, he gripped Mark by the waist and kissed him. Mark missed the taste of his lips, and he couldn’t deny his boyfriends’ statement, so he eagerly kissed him back. However, when Jinyoung’s hands slipped under his shirt, the older pushed him away.

 

“What is it now?” Jinyoung looked at him confusedly.

 

“When we talk to Jacks about us tomorrow, I want him to know that I only cheated once. I don’t wanna do more stuff behind his back. I must properly break up with him first, before I can sleep with you again. You should agree with me, after all he’s your best friend. You don’t wanna hurt his feelings any further, right?” Mark stared directly into his eyes.

 

“I probably won’t have a best friend after tomorrow. He really likes you and I took you from him. He even completed the stupid fidelity test without even realizing it. It’s been more than a month now. I didn’t think he could do it. I have never seen him like this, never. The old Wang Jackson is gone. I can’t recognize now. And I bet he must think just the same about me.” Jinyoung seemed to ponder his own words. He almost sounded sad for a minute.

 

“He knew you were bluffing earlier. While everyone thought you were having one of your psychotic episodes after you came back from the kitchen with Eric, he remained calm. He knew you wouldn’t tell the whole world about us. He still gets you. You guys don’t have to become strangers to each other. I would hate that.” Mark said gently as he ran his fingers through his lover’s silky hair.

 

“Me too.” Jinyoung said quietly as he stared at his feet, and Mark was sure that the Korean meant that. The American was about to say something else when they started hearing loud moans and sex noises coming from the other room, right next to the one they were.

 

“Shit, someone is enjoying their night.” Mark chuckled. And when Jinyoung lifted his eyes to meet his, he could already see excitement in them.

 

“That’s 2Jae happening, right at this moment!” the Korean announced delightfully.

 

“Come on, it could be anyone.” Mark shook his head at him.

 

“Does it bother you? The fact that they are finally together now? Do you happen to be jealous?” Jinyoung narrowed his eyes at the older.

 

“No.” Mark said shortly, shaking his head awkwardly.

 

“Why don’t we go check on them?” the younger suggested mischievously.

 

“What?!” Mark looked scandalized.

 

“I must see if my plan worked!” Jinyoung announced, as he quickly exited the closet and swiftly walked out of the room. He promptly stopped in front of the next door and pressed his ear on it. Mark was right behind him, trying to convince the young Lim of abandoning that ludicrous idea of surprising whatever couple was having such a loud sex. Yet, for some reason Jinyoung’s animated expression suddenly turned into a frown.

 

“What did you hear? Can you recognize one of the voices? Is it them?” The American became curious.

 

“Maybe we should leave them to it. Come on, I’ll take you home.” Jinyoung said awkwardly as he grabbed his arm. The American’s curiosity only increased, and he refused to leave with him.

 

“Seriously?! Come on, who are they?” Mark insisted.

 

“You don’t wanna know.” Jinyoung’s intriguing words made Mark push him away from the door. The American seemed to forget all his reservations from earlier and simply barged into the room.

 

“I swear to God, this wasn’t in my plans.” Jinyoung whispered behind him.

 

There in bed, lied Jackson and Eric. Their seemingly naked bodies were partially covered by the sheets and neither Jinyoung nor Mark missed the detail that Eric was certainly the one who was topping.

 

“What the fuck is this?!” Mark shouted, as he made an exaggerated gesture with his hands. The idol quickly got up from the bed with a sheet around his waist, but Jackson held him by the hand before he could take another step away from him.

 

“Do you mind letting us finish?” Jackson asked indifferently as he turned his head to the couple at the door.

 

“Jack, seriously?! The fuck is wrong with you man?” Jinyoung eyed him in disbelief.

 

“I should get going now.” Eric announced as he brushed Jackson’s hand away and tried to leave the room. But Mark was faster and pulled him back to the bed and jumped on top of him. The first thing he noticed was that as soon as the sheets fell, the idol was still wearing pants. A sarcastic laugh escaped the Hongkonger’s lips when he saw the puzzled look on Mark’s face.

 

“Don’t kill me, Little Rooster. It’s just a prank.” Eric eyed him with a gleam of regret in his eyes. His ex took a minute or two to pull himself together and fight the urge of punching the idol.

 

“Can you explain to me what are you playing at?!” Mark demanded, as he got off the idol and stood up. He bit his lower lip when he glanced at Jackson and saw him in his boxers. Jinyoung leaned against the wall and watched the scene with bafflement. He studied his American boyfriend’s features silently. He assumed that Mark had no reason to be so angry, since he was going to end things with the Hongkonger soon.

 

“I just wanted you to know, at least for a second, how it feels like to know that your boyfriend cheated on you.” Jackson stated, as his eyes travelled from Jinyoung to Mark.

 

“Jack.” Mark started, but the Hongkonger simply collected his clothes from the floor and went into the bathroom. An alarmed Mark followed him. Jinyoung wanted to remain in the room, but Eric insisted to have a word with him outside. Eventually, the idol managed convince the Korean to give the other couple some privacy.

 

"Did you plan to say goodbye at least?" Jackson asked as he pulled up his pants.

 

"What are you talking about?" Mark anguished voice resonated into the bathroom.

 

"You told Dorine you're running away with your stepbrother, right? Which one of them?” The Hongkonger sounded and looked hurt. “The truth is, at this point I think you might even take off with Nam too!" Jackson accused, though he wanted to believe that Eric had no intention of going back to his ex.

 

"Look, I only said that to Dorine so she wouldn't interfere with my life. You've seen how she is. It's my fault she found out that something was going on between one of my stepbrothers and I. Of course I'm not saying goodbye to you. I'm not running away with Eric either. What the hell?! Stop acting like you don't know me." Mark retorted.

 

"Well, I don't, Little Rooster! By the way, what the fuck kind of nickname is that?" Jackson frowned.

 

"Look, I broke up with Nam months ago! I unfriended him on social media, I deleted his contact from my phone and we were in different countries, for God's sake! You have no reason to feel threatened by him, seriously!" Mark declared exasperated. He wanted to delay that moment of revelation as much as he could.

 

"What about Jinyoung?!" Jackson inquired, as he picked up a pack of cigarette from the sink, took one out, lit it and took a long drag. Mark had only seen Jackson smoke once. It was the morning after the throuple arrangement had become official, and they had discarded rule 77.

 

"What about him?" Mark asked, knowing exactly what his boyfriend was getting at. He wondered why the young Lim wasn’t there to help him explain things to Jackson.

 

"Is he the one? He's your rule 77?" Jackson asked at once. He didn't care about Mark's answer, he just needed to know. The American swallowed hard and took a deep breath. It pained him to hurt the younger.

 

"I love both of you. What do you want me to do about it, huh?" Mark shrugged nervously. At that point, he didn’t know what he was saying anymore. He just didn’t want to be hated by Jackson.

 

"Liar." Jackson stated caustically.

 

"Jia Er." Mark said in a hurt tone.

 

"Where's your bracelet, Mark?" The Hongkonger demanded, impatiently as he pointed to the American’s wrist.

 

"I don't know! I lost it. How many times do I have to tell you?" Mark shouted at him.

 

"Jinyoung said you took if off because now you're his! He said you gave it to him as a proof that he's the only one for you now. Can you confirm what he said?" Jackson said as he gritted his teeth and took the said bracelet out of his pocket. He waved it in front of Mark's livid face.

 

"He's the one who's lying, don't you see?! He wanted to take this off me since the day you put it on my wrist!" Mark couldn't believe that the Korean went that far to brake them up. He felt betrayed.

 

"Mark, how would he be able to take it from you without you noticing it?" Jackson demanded.

 

"When we were having sex?" Mark suggested a bit awkwardly.

 

"You guys had sex after he confessed?" Jackson's eyes blinked repetitively.

 

"Yeah." The American's voice was almost a whisper.

 

"Who topped?" The younger demanded quickly.

 

"Are you seriously making that stupid question now? Does it really matter who topped or who bottomed? It's simply sex! It's not like we haven't done it before. Nothing's changed." Mark lied.

 

"It matters to me. The three of us had an agreement. Answer me, goddamit!"

 

"I did." Mark lied through his teeth.

 

"Bullshit." He shook his head.

 

"Why are you asking me about it if you already know the answer?" The defeat in Mark's pained voice made the other gasp.

 

"Set me free, Mark. Just tell me that the Markjinson throuple is cancelled and that Markjin came to stay. Just break up with me already. I can handle it, okay? I promise you I will not bite your neck off, I will not start fights, nor will I take drugs and stand on the ledge of a roof. I won't set fire to buildings either, nor I'll go astray." Jackson claimed, as he stared hard into his eyes.

 

"He topped. I asked for it. I enjoyed it, and so did he. I told Jinyoung I love him. And yes, I'd have ran away with him if Dorine or anyone found out and tried to tear us apart. I can't imagine my life without him now." Mark was cruelly blunt. Still, he felt like apologizing to Jackson for saying those words. 

 

"We're over then." Jackson said out loud. Mark’s heart skipped a beat.

 

"We don't have to be. I can talk with Jin. The three of us will be okay. We love each other!" Mark's voice cracked and he couldn't hold back his sobs anymore.

 

"Sweetheart, I'm an experienced fencer. I've been to countless competitions. I can actually tell when victory is not supposed to be mine. Throughout the years I have learned how to accept defeat and I'm not a sore loser." Jackson stated with a bittersweet smile on his lips. Mark's tears fell copiously.

"I do love you." The older said, as he walked to the Hongkonger and held his face with both hands.

"But you love him more. My greedy, wicked friend probably realized that already, and we both know that, in the actual circumstances, he’s not willing to share." Jackson stated, as his own eyes watered. He gently avoided The American’s touch, finished getting dressed and exited the bathroom.

"Jack." Mark whined pitifully as he followed the Hongkonger to the empty bedroom.

"I'll be fine. You'll be fine. We'll be fine. Just give it some time, okay?" The Hongkonger said as he kissed the top of his head, put away his cigarette and walked away from him. That was definitely one of the worst parties Mark had even been.



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